Friday, October 1, 2010

When comfort eating no longer helps

I need to eat right because I love myself... and love myself enough when I do make the wrong choices to get back to making the right ones, whenever possible.... which I guess is all the time and I KNOW this. I have lost a lot of weight in the past when I was working at a freaking bakery and deli, so I know it's just about avoiding the wrong choices and eating the right ones.

I feel like I just want to be "naughty" and eat the wrong ones, but what the fuck is that about? I feel like it's the 5 year old girl who got comfort from eating... and still does... sadly.

As much as I just want to binge and eat everything bad lately, the universe is telling me that it will not bring me happiness. I think that is when my food addiction will finally end... when it quits working.... and it pretty much has, thank goodness!

I still fit into my winter tops from last year, which are size 18/20. I'm on the downward spiral, dammit! Even if I am kicking and screaming!

My mom is on-plan with me, I mean, she is sick of being fat and she is all for the "meat and veggies" plan that we have around here when we are eating right.

Last time I lived with a boyfriend, I would just make all these low carb meals and then end up chowing down the cereal and crackers later, anyway. I even talked about it ahead of time, that I could not have certain things in the house, but it kind of fell the the wayside... and trust me, I was right there, cheering him on when he suggested pizza. Ultimately, I'm in charge of my body... and my future.. and my, everything.....

For me, losing weight is just finally growing up and stopping these childish habits.


  1. I hear ya. I'm right there with you. What happened to us? We were low carbing stars! Now we will get back on track. No more of this, "today is my last carb day" just no more. We did it before we can do it again.

  2. Not-so-large and in-charge!
    It's all good!

  3. Self realization only helps, IMO. At least half the battle is mental. Good on you for allowing yourself to feel and think about the underlying reasons why food plays the role it does in your life.