Wednesday, May 26, 2010

Chocolate chips in the night and waking up during surgery

I woke up in the middle of the night, stuffing my face with food. Guess what I found? Half a bag of semi-sweet chocolate chips. I'm not sure of how many I ate, but I do remember being pissed off that they weren't very sweet. Luckily, I'm pretty sure I didn't have that many.

I didn't remember it until this morning when I opened the refrigerator to see some frozen pound cake out of the freezer. Initially, I started eating this, but must have decided on the chocolate chips... I seriously forgot the chocolate chips were even in there. Some nook of my mind must have remembered. I better throw them away!!!

WHY would I do this to myself? I wonder - is it me being super hungry and by body saying FEED ME or a secret desire for self-destruction?

Well, I do suffer from very strange sleep patterns. I have been known to sleep walk as a child and I have also eaten in my sleep before. Oh, and weirder yet, I woke up on the surgery table when they were operating on both of my knees when I was 12 or 13. LUCKILY, I do not remember it, but I did wake up with my IV in a different place... Apparently I had ripped it out and it took several nurses to hold me down.

I still don't know why it happened, but apparently it's more common than people think. However, the instances that I have read about online where people have woken up during surgery is that they are conscious but unable to move or tell the surgeon that they are feeling it. I would probably prefer to have my situation happen, kicking and screaming and totally freaking out.

After surgery, my anesthesiologist asked me if I walked in my sleep and I told him I did. He said that my body may not go into paralysis as it should in certain patterns of sleep. FREAKY! So that little aspect makes me dread any type of surgery like 100 x more than I did anyway.

Aside from my chocolate chip situation, I've been eating very low carb lately and loving it. When I fuel my body with appropriate foods, I like myself more. When I give myself processed junk, it's more of a self-loathing feeling afterward... not to mention the sickness plus the weight gain. Honestly, though, I would prefer the liking myself feeling to the weight loss any day.

Monday, May 24, 2010

Day 359 Low Carb Menu

Day 359 Menu

- Ham~broccoli~cheddar quiche
- Spaghetti squash with ground beef, no sugar added spaghetti sauce and cheese
- Oopsie roll with butter and Parmesan cheese

Dinner: not sure yet

Thursday, May 20, 2010

Move over Rice a Roni!

Menu for Thursday

- Two scrambled eggs, fried in butter
- Half pound burger with provolone cheese, lettuce, tomato slice, onion, mayo, mustard and low carb ketchup... on an oopsie roll
- Strawberry shortcake: low carb pound cake, strawberries sweetened with Splenda and too much real whipped cream on top
- Healthy cauliflower risotto*
- Grilled pork chop with low carb bbq sauce dipped in low carb ketchup

*I have been making faux starch dishes for years using cauliflower, and this puts most of the others to shame. Now, I did add in some mushrooms and I used heavy whipping cream instead of half and half. I have never had traditional rice risotto before, but I'm telling you, this stuff is amazing. Also, I used cheddar cheese and added a little extra because I'm a total maniac for cheese. This reminded me much of Rice-a-Roni... You will feel like you have died and gone to San Fransisco!

I have come to expect healthy and yummy recipes over at Healthy Fellow, but it never ceases to amaze me when I come across a recipe that reminds me of a former favorite of my processed food past. When I was a teen and my mom would make Rice a Roni and steak, broccoli and bread, I would literally pass on the steak and load up on extra side dishes... and I always had seconds.... always. Now, I never do... and I just realized that. You would think I would have realized it before. I think part of it is because the quality of the calories I am getting is so much better.... like leaving me satiated.

I'm on a quest to treat my body better. You can move anywhere in the world, but you still have to live in your body. I want to treat it better, slowly but surely.... and I'm getting there.

Wednesday, May 19, 2010

Low Carb Menu for Wednesday

Menu for Wednesday

- Two hot dogs with cheese, onions, mustard and low carb ketchup on oopsies
- Half pound burger with lettuce, tomato, onion, mustard, mayo and low carb ketchup
- Hamburger/no-sugar-added-marinara/cheesy spaghetti squash bake
- Oopsie roll

"Whether you think you can or can't, you're usually right." ~Henry Ford

"Failure is simply the opportunity to begin again, this time more intelligently."~Henry Ford again

Monday, May 17, 2010

I have a pill box!

I organized my pill box!

I am taking quite a few vitamins and supplements, including a Women's Multivitamin, Vitamin C, 5-HTP with Valerian root, Fish Oil, Glucosamine Sulfate with Chondroiton Sulfate, Vitamin D-3(10,000) IU, and Calcium-Magnesium-Zinc with Vitamin D.

I also really love shopping at because they have awesome prices, free shipping with a minimum order, no sales tax, and they have a cash back program for "drugstore dollars" through them. These are dollars off your future orders with them... ALSO, through, I also get an additional 6% cash back on my purchases through by using their Cash Back Shopping link. On top of that, does have decent prices to begin with and good sales. Their shipping is very fast and I just love that place.

If you shop online, you should really sign up for Just in the past year, I have gotten over $100 cash back from them by using the Cash Back Shopping link. They also have great forums for freebies, coupons, etc. In my opinion, though, Cash Back Shopping is where it's at, as long as you are shopping online anyway... It's kind of like getting your own "affiliate" dollars, in a way. I mean, I do a lot of online shopping, but even if you just do a little... Why not add an extra click to save yourself some dollars?

I don't like the fact that some of my vitamins and supplements contain carbs, but the point of all this is better health, right? I never really realized I took so much stuff, until I realized that I fill up my whole pill box with these supplements. It is a lot of pills, too, because I take more than one of many of the pills.

I would love to know... What do YOU take?? What is in your medicine cabinet? Yeah, I'm nosy..



5-16-10 - Menu

- Burger on an oopsie with cheese, lettuce, tomato and onion
- Chicken nuggets with bbq sauce
- French fries
- Apple pie
- Burger on an oopsie with cheese, lettuce, tomato and onion

I know, I know... I screwed up..

However, I kind of had a break thru... somewhat... Instead of just saying, Okay, this whole day is blown, I decided to get RIGHT BACK on track with low carbing instead of waiting a day or a week or a month or years!!! See, I first started attempting to do low carb back in 2001, so it has been quite a journey for me. I guess that as long as we are still breathing, we are still on the journey!! Whether we want to take the reigns or not, we are really the ones calling the shots.

Saturday, May 15, 2010

Saturday's Eats

Saturday's Low Carb Menu

- Tuna salad on an oopsie with cheese and tomato
- Low carb pancakes with two sausage patties and no-carb maple syrup
- Grilled BBQ chicken breast (with low home made low carb bbq sauce ala Mom) on an oopsie with cheese, lettuce, tomato and mayo
- Half pound hot pepper jack cheese burger on an oopsie with lettuce, tomato, mayo, mustard and low carb ketchup

Low carb menu for 5-14-10

Low carb menu for Friday

- Double chocolate coconut protein shake
- Tuna salad on an oopsie with tomato and cheese
- Half pound burger on oopsie with tomato, onion and cheese
- Mashed cauliflower with butter

Friday, May 14, 2010

5-13-10 Low carb menu

5-13-10 Low carb menu

- Korean meatballs
- Cheesy spaghetti squash and broccoli casserole
- Tuna on an oopsie roll with tomato
- Tuna with cheese and tomato on an oopsie roll

These meatballs are okay, but I probably won't be making them again anytime soon. I think they are a little too salty for my liking, but they are not bad.

On 5-12-10, I had a horrible eating day... Real burger buns, burritos and pizza... and none of them were worth it, by the way. I am not even kidding... Once I start eating carbs, it is hard for me to quit. Similar to me and alcohol, which is why I do not drink but one or two times a year if that.

I think that I have an allergy to alcohol or maybe it's just my Native American blood that cannot tolerate as well as the "white man" can. I have actually read reports which claim that if I were to eat a meal, consisting of a burger and a beer, and you were to also eat at same meal (me being the Native American and you being another race), you would digest any alcohol first, whereas my body would recognize the alcohol as foreign and does not digest it right away. I would digest anything else first and then the alcohol, keeping it in my blood stream longer.

Now, in my college Anthropology course, I learned that race is not a biological construct, so this part of it does not make sense to me. Maybe it's the environmental factors, considering that Native Americans did live here for decades without alcohol being readily available, whereas other groups of people have been drinking it for centuries longer than the Native Americans. I always thought it was kind of like a negative stereotype about the "drunken Indian," when it turns out, we are really just not as used to drinking at as the white man. Peyote, on the other hand, is an entirely different story... My ancestors definitely loved to pass the peace pipe.

I think that getting on plan is not as difficult, though, if you were just off for a meal or a day or so...

I went to the chiropractor last night and I feel great. Happy Friday! Have a great weekend, all!


Wednesday, May 12, 2010

Low carb menu

Low carb menu for 5-11-10

- Protein shake
- Smoked turkey with cheese, mayo and tomato on an oopsie roll
- Cheesy scrambled eggs
- Two sausage patties
- Low carb pancakes with low carb pancake syrup
- Atkins bar
- Ham on an oopsie roll with cheese, mayo and tomato

I love these pancakes soo much. I didn't really have anything thawed out to cook, so I just whipped these up. They are actually pretty easy to make. I don't have plain soy protein powder, so I just use Designer French Vanilla whey protein powder and they are very good. I also leave out the cinnamon in the recipe because I have found that it has a tendency to make these pancakes a little bit more runny when trying to fry them. Lastly, I use a "heaping" half-cup of cottage cheese because in my opinion, a half cup just isn't enough. The cottage cheese helps to make the pancakes thicker. These look like real pancakes and taste almost like them, too. The texture is not 100%, but they are very good. Oh, one more thing... be sure to add in the 4 tablespoons of oil into the batter and use butter or whatever you like for frying. They are sooo good and that is why I had to make another batch yesterday! I make them using my 1/4 cup scoop per pancake.

Tuesday, May 11, 2010

Mother's Day and Menu

Low Carb Menu for 5-10-10

- Cheeseburger on an oopsie roll with onion and tomato
- Smoked turkey with colby, tomato and mayo on an oopsie
- A peanut butter cheesecake bite
- Cheeseburger on an oopsie roll with onion and tomato
- Cheesy spaghetti squash and broccoli casserole
- Zucchini coconut flax muffin

Menu on Mother's Day - I went off plan for brunch and honestly... by the time I got around to having dinner, I just ended up eating some low carb leftovers because I was totally over how sugar makes me feel. I am glad that I did go off my plan, actually... because it showed me that I can have a scheduled deviation for a holiday and it's okay... The world does not come to and end and neither does my plan!

I hope that all you mothers out there had a lovely day!!!

Saturday, May 8, 2010

Day 4 Low Carb Menu

May 7th, 2010 Menu

- Double chocolate coconut protein shake
- Low carb pancakes with maple syrup and two sausage patties
- Three Atkins bars
- Smoked turkey and cheese on an oopsie with mayo
- Big, fat cheese burger with tomato and onion on an oopsie roll

Do yourself a favor and never eat more than one Atkins bar at a time... Gross!!!

I got on the scale today.... 276.4... Another pound down! I have decided to nix the scale until like next week... but last time I did that, I gained like several pounds so I am almost afraid to get rid of the scale... though I know I need to..... What about you guys? Do you weigh daily or weekly or what?

Friday, May 7, 2010

Low carb menu for Thursday

Low Carb Menu for 5-6-10 - Day Three

- Tuna salad with tomato on an oopsie roll
- Home made beef stew (made with onion, celery, yellow squash, zucchini, green pepper, Roma tomato and broccoli)
- Zucchini flax muffin*
- Half pound burger with tomato an onion on an oopsie
- Two scrambled eggs
- Low carb pancakes with sugar free pancake syrup

*I added an extra egg and a half cup shredded coconut to the batter before I made these... They are soooo good.

Thursday, May 6, 2010

5-5-10 Low Carb Menu

5-5-10 Low Carb Menu

Weight: 277.6

I still have 103.4 pounds to lose, but my BMI is officially out of the 40's and back in the 30's..... Wahooo!! Out of the morbid obesity zone and it only took me TWO DAYS to do it!!!

I really love this way of eating.


Wednesday, May 5, 2010

Every day is day one if you think about it

Day One Low Carb Food Menu
  • 2 eggs with butter
  • home made beef stew (made with onion, celery, yellow squash, zucchini, green pepper and broccoli)
  • Two tuna salad sandwiches on oopsies with tomato
  • Cheesy spaghetti squash
  • Half pound burger on oopsie with tomato and onion
  • Three peanut butter cheesecake bites
First of all, thank you all for your comments!!! Not only do I heart them, but they HELP me.... to know that I need to stay on track, know that I can stay on track.... and know that I will stay on track. Also, I find it helpful that you guys seem to "get" what I'm doing. No funny looks from any of you if I go into month-long burger frenzies that leave me with mustard on my lip.

THE GOOD NEWS?!?! Okay, when I got on the scale this morning, 280.4. Yep, I have NEVER been this happy to see a number like this. I got on again to make sure it was right and it flashed over to 279 for a second then read again: 280.4. That is over seven pounds in one day. That can't be right.... but I'm going with it! YES I AM! Yesterday, this scale told me that I was 288.8 and quite frankly, I was afraid to re-weigh yesterday because I did not want to go into the 290's again.

You have to realize though, I was binging on everything and anything in sight. I was literally on the see food diet... I would see food and eat it, with no regard to its nutritional content. WHAT was I thinking?? I was clearly under the addiction of the refined carbs and basically just wanted my next fix, all while ignoring - or putting on the back burner - my then-growing waistline.

Also, I must note (sorry boys) that it is my TOM now, so I am uber-bloated anyway.... and the night before I weighed in at 288.8, I had a big binge, so I'm sure some of that weight was that food alone. Gross. I'm sure the other part of it was water weight, but I am still excited to see the number moving the the right direction.

I actually feel like two totally different people, based on what I eat. I'm either crazy-carb-obsessed, cannot-quit-eating or quite the opposite. WHEN will I realize that this is a true addiction for me?? Processed food??

In case you are wondering my "plan," I'm not really going super-strict induction mode, but I do want to stick with very low carb. I am not the type that can eat a small amount of processed food, so it's best to keep it out of my mouth completely. I am allowing certain foods (tomatoes, a tiny amount of natural peanut butter, onions, whey protein powder and probably a very small amount of almond flour and also flax) into my diet that are not necessarily suitable for induction, but are relatively low carb.

Tuesday, May 4, 2010

Induction: Day 1 - Confession time!

I got on the scale... and it was depressing... Not moderately depressing, but really depressing.

I know what happens when I eat so much sugar and refined carbohydrates in various binges... weight gain. It does not take rocket science to figure it out.

Well, I'm actually glad that the scale number was VERY depressing, because it means that I'm drawing the line here. No more.

I even thought when waking up this morning, gosh, I feel "heavy..." Like I have extra to carry around.

Before I got on the scale today, I made myself a promise. NO MATTER THE NUMBER ON THE SCALE, I will get you out of the two hundreds. No matter the number, it's gonna go down... I'm gonna lose it all.... 288.8. OUCH. The last time I weighed, it said 274.0. The good news is that I did step back on the scale before getting back over 300. That would have been the third time in my life weighing over 300, and quite frankly, my bad knee just can't take this weight and the rest of me doesn't feel like hauling it around either.

I could not even find the scale when I looked for it, though, so it had been a while of depression, non-caring and basically tuning out of life through binge eating.

Today, I like the scale because it gives me the reality check I need.

I'm going to be back in the 260's before I know it... (Back in October, I was down to 252!!!)

I know that a lot of this is water weight (or so I HOPE!!!) and I know it will drop off quickly and I am officially back in induction, Day One.

I'm back in the morbidly obese zone with a BMI of 41.3, but I literally cannot wait to report that I am back out of that zone... and I promise to myself, I will be soon.

I'm just so mad at myself... but this time, I'm gonna do better.