Friday, November 11, 2011

Low carb menu and not eating my feelings

- Waffle with one sausage patty with sugar free syrup
- Unpotato salad
- Half pound burger on an oopsie roll with tomato, onion, mustard, mayo and low carb ketchup
- Cheesy spaghetti squash casserole
- Brownie with low carb frosting

When I used to be upset, pissed off, mad at the world, feeling sorry for myself, whatever... I would medicate myself with food. Food is not a very suitable medication for me... So last night, when I wanted to binge, I got out my journal and wrote, wrote, wrote until I felt like all of my feelings were on paper. It felt good to give a voice to the feelings, if nothing else. It felt good to honor how I felt and take care of myself a little bit, by giving my feelings a place to go instead of just stuffing them down. Over-indulging when I really just feel sad never really helps anyway until I just want to eat more, more more and just end up fall asleep anyway. I ended up going to bed early anyway and I'm sure it took me longer to get to sleep than it would have if I binged, but I laid there with my feelings and just felt them until sleep finally carried me away. I think exercising, cleaning and the like would also be a good way of distracting myself from my feelings, but it was nice to give them a voice for once.

I had a dream that I binged last night. It was a pretty horrible dream. I was eating some kind of junk food and I was like a pig in shit, just loving it way too much. It was very odd and I hated the way I felt after binging in the dream.


  1. I'll bet you sighed in relief when you woke up because it didn't happen! I hope you are feeling better today. You can always email me if you need someone to talk to who isn't right there to see face-to-face. Sometimes I right posts and then delete them. Just the act of writing it down (or typing it out) makes me feel better too.

  2. Thanks so much, Oct!

    I appreciate your support.

  3. You are one of the strongest women that I've ever had the honor of knowing. You seem to thrive when you meet opposition. I'm not saying that it is easy for you, only that you make it look easy. You are so brave and I've seen you change your life without a backward glance. Not many people could be so committed to their health.

    I truly believe that there is nothing that you are not capable of, but I will always be here to support you.


  4. Life is but a dream!
    And you rock it!